TRANSCRIPT Ross and Carrie and Sister Rocky

Transcript

music
									
“Oh No, Ross and Carrie! Theme Song” by Brian Keith Dalton. A jaunty, upbeat instrumental.
carrie poppy
									
Hello, and welcome to Oh No, Ross and Carrie! The show where we don’t just report on fringe science, spirituality, and claims of the paranormal. No, no, no. We take part ourselves!
ross blocher
									
That’s right! When they make the claims, we show up so you don’t have to! I’m Ross Blocher.
carrie
									
And I’m Ross Blocher. [Ross makes “hmm” sound.] And we have an update episode for the end of 2019!
ross
									
Yeah. Maybe not a comprehensive update, but uh, wanted to let you know how the year went, and also how some predictions panned out. And this will be our last episode for 2019. We’re taking a couple weeks off. So, uh.
carrie
									
Holidays.
ross
									
We hope you all have a wonderful holiday, whatever you celebrate, or don’t.
carrie
									
Yeah, or don’t even have a good time if you don’t want to.
ross
									
Yeah, you know what? We don’t want to force you into anything. Be miserable.
carrie
									
[Ross responds affirmatively multiple times.] You know, if Ebenezer Scrooge listens to this, do you. Yeah. Anyway, at the beginning of this year we went to see a storefront psychic named Sister Rocky, and she made some predictions for our lives and the country, sort of, and our health. A whole bunch of stuff. And we wanted to go back and see how they panned out.
ross
									
Yeah, she is a life coach and “clairdoyant”, as her business card says. [Both chuckle.] And uh, both of us had some pretty dire predictions about what was gonna happen. We both wanted to get some political lowdown, and she was not forthcoming on politics. But you, in the episode, you said, “I hope we get an impeachment this year.” [Carrie responds affirmatively.] And it looks like we got a squeaker, right before the end! [Both cheer quietly, saying “woo-hoo!”]
carrie
									
So anyway, come to my storefront psychic shop. I am now a psychic in 2020.
ross
									
Yeah. Well, hey, that’s, I think, one of the best hits so far.
carrie
									
Yeah, although I—I dunno, saying, “I hope he does,” I don’t know if that’s the same as predicting.
ross
									
Oh, fair enough.
carrie
									
We went back through and we made a little spreadsheet of all of these predictions that she made.
ross
									
And by “we”, we mean Carrie.
carrie
									
Well, you contributed to your part. I’m looking at it.
ross
									
[Chuckling] Well, uh, yeah. It was interesting just to see. This is always the hard thing to do, really the impossible thing to do, while you’re talking to a psychic, is to keep a list and actually track everything he or she says is gonna happen. And that sets up a great situation where you’re gonna remember the things that did pan out, or that were significant to you. And everything else, you know, your brain just can’t hold all that. Not what brains do.
carrie
									
Even if you are a sort of critical thinker, you’re skeptical of psychics and so on, your brain is still great at this. And I found that people will message me about Drew’s and my engagement and be like, “Sister Rocky was right! Oh my god, someone was right!” And that is a great hit, but also she made some dire predictions for my life that we’ve all just forgotten.
ross
									
Right, yeah. That’s how that works.
carrie
									
That’s how that works, that’s what your brain does.
ross
									
And uh, critical thinkers, we want to hear nice things about ourselves and so we lock onto those. “Yeah, she’s right, I am a cheerful person.” [Carrie laughs.] But then, you know, the other things—
carrie
									
Darn tootin’!
ross
									
—yeah, the things that are maybe not so good about us, you know, if they’re correct, we’ll lock onto them, but we’re very good at just rejecting things. So like, “Eh, that’s not me, that’s not right.” [Carrie responds affirmatively.] Anyway, so we’re trying to do the thorough thing and check up on these predictions. So yeah, let’s see how 2019 panned out according to psychic Sister Rocky.
carrie
									
Alright, so you went first, and her first prediction it looks like was that you have many long years ahead.
ross
									
Well, I’m not dead yet.
carrie
									
Yeah, you didn’t die this year! Let’s call it a hit.
ross
									
So, okay. [Carrie laughs.] Alright. Well done. That was just looking at my lifeline on my hand. Alright, let’s see. She said that I stress very easily. I always struggle with this one. You know, I do a lot of stuff and I do it as fast as I can, but I don’t do any more than that. But, uh, I’ve certainly been feeling some mounting anxiety over this past year, just with not being able to keep up with everything that I want to be doing, or that I commit to doing. So uh, I don’t know if I call that stressing easily, but I’ll call it a mild hit. 
carrie
									
Okay. I also feel like it’s hard if you’ve never been anyone else. What are you comparing this to?
ross
									
Yeah. I don’t know, others around me. Well, you’re around me, would be better qualified to say if like, I’m constantly in that state of stress or—
carrie
									
Oh, yeah. I’m gonna guess, okay. If I think of like, you now versus five or six years ago, I’d say you’re more stressed.
ross
									
Yeah. Yeah, and you know, when you have people who are close to you, they are your opportunity to sort of unload, and say, “Ugh you know…” [Carrie responds affirmatively and laughs.] Here’s everything I’ve been carrying and not talking to people about all day long. So, definitely I can belly ache to Carrie and uh, Kara and Andrew. So, I’ll give that a sideways, uh sure. Um, she told me that I dwell on the past and to get over it.
carrie
									
Okay. Have you been thinking about that ever since? [Both laugh.]
ross
									
No. I was just reminded as I was looking at this spreadsheet. But, it’s funny, my dad is very much that kind of person who will still sort of obsess over something that he aid or did years ago. And I think I may have inherited a little bit of that, where I can still, like at certain times of the day, run over things that I did a long time ago and I feel bad about. I don’t think it’s always in my mind, ever present. So, I’ll give this another semi-hit. She said that I’m cheerful.
carrie
									
I’d say that you’re cheerful.
ross
									
I’ll take it!
carrie
									
I would say, especially in a context like this, that would be, you know, where you’re meeting a new person, you’re friendly. Yeah.
ross
									
She said that I’m sensitive and emotional. Alright. Sure. [Carrie laughs.] Okay, here we go. Now we start getting into actual predictions. She said that the next six months will be rough.
carrie
									
Yeah, so let’s see. That would have been January through June, 2019.
ross
									
We did a bunch of touring.
carrie
									
We did.
ross
									
Which was fun, but also a lot of work.
carrie
									
Yeah, high impact.
ross
									
I went to South by Southwest, that was fun. Definitely things were busy at work, they’ve been busy all year. My son graduated.
carrie
									
From High School, yeah.
ross
									
Yeah, but nothing I would call rough, necessarily. You know hat, my cousin Scott did die in May. The end of May. That was rough.
carrie
									
Very unexpected.
ross
									
Yeah, it was. So, that’s the only thing that I could point at this for six months and say that was rough. I don’t think the whole six months were rough.
carrie
									
Got it. Okay.
ross
									
Extraordinarily so. “Bad luck will turn to good during the 7th month.”
carrie
									
Okay, so July.
ross
									
It’s funny. My best way of recalling my past year very quickly was just to go through my photo roll, ‘cause I take pictures all the time of everything. So I did that, and I didn’t see any characteristic shift from the first half of the year to the second half, in those terms. So I’m calling that a miss.
carrie
									
My birthday was that month. [Ross responds emphatically.] So, an evening’s birthday, evening Blocher!
ross
									
I don’t know if that’s bad luck turning to good, but happy birthday.
carrie
									
It was very good luck that people you love were still alive.
ross
									
Indeed. She said there would be a completion during the 7th month. Again, don’t know what that would mean.
carrie
									
Oh, right. We guessed that maybe we were going to go to Teal Swan’s Completion Process—
ross
									
Oh, right. And that did not happen.
carrie
									
—during July. Nope.
ross
									
I went to Camp Quest West. That’s pretty good.
carrie
									
You love that place.
ross
									
Did that in the 7th month. She said my heart is not doing well, but not physically, emotionally.
carrie
									
Okay. [Ross makes unenthused sound.] Your love life or something.
ross
									
Well, she gets into that more. But yeah, I’m calling that a miss. I don’t know what that means. And then yeah, she did say more overtly that I’m doing poorly in love.
carrie
									
Oof, okay.
ross
									
Nope.
carrie
									
No? Alright.
ross
									
And that I’ve been hurt three times, and I’d have a really hard time knowing how to parse that.
carrie
									
Yeah, either it’s a very big number or a very small number.
ross
									
Right, depending how you define that being hurt. It’s like defining a planet versus a dwarf planet, you know? If you allow Pluto to be a planet, there’s a lot of other things that are technically planets. [Carrie responds affirmatively.] So you make it the largest of the dwarf planets. Uh, so—
carrie
									
And if you’re a person who’s been struck by lightning three times, we’d be like, “That’s an amazing hit!” But if you’re a person who has, you know, had three medium-sized bad things happen to him by the time he’s 37, eh, well, alright.
ross
									
So it wasn’t the sort of thing where I immediately go like, “Oh yeah! I know what you’re talking about.”
carrie
									
“I know what that means.”
ross
									
My heart chakra is spinning poorly. I can’t speak to that. [Carrie laughs.] Maybe? Uh, I’m jealous of others, not in a relationship sense. I was reminded of a friend of mine, Bob Kurtz, very talented animator. And he talks about this thing called joyful jealousy, when you have people around you and they’re doing amazing things, and you’re like really happy for them, but at the same time like, “Oh, I wish I had done that.” [Carrie responds affirmatively.] So I experience that all the time.
carrie
									
Sure, but it sort of lacks the resentment aspect. Yeah. That’s good.
ross
									
Yeah, but definitely there’s a lot of people around me doing really cool things, and I’m happy for them.
carrie
									
Yeah. I don’t think that’s probably the kind of thing she meant.
ross
									
So, okay. Fail. She sensed good chemistry between us.
carrie
									
[Emphatically] Hey! Hit!
ross
									
We approve. [Carrie laughs.] She said that I’m struggling in love.
carrie
									
Okay, boy, she’s really trying to make that make sense to you.
ross
									
Yeah, and I dunno, if she had said that seven years ago, maybe I could have made something out of that. But no, it really doesn’t resonate on any level. She said I’m not very trusting. [Chuckling] That’s a psychic talking to me, so, okay.
carrie
									
[Laughing] ‘Cause you don’t trust psychics.
ross
									
Yeah. Otherwise, very trusting. That I always have my guard up? Sure. Around a psychic.
carrie
									
Okay. Fair enough.
ross
									
Uh, do I always have my guard up in general? Again, I don’t know how to compare my experience to others. I don’t feel like that’s true, but that could just mean being positive about myself.
carrie
									
Right, and if you always had it up, it would be a hard thing to know about yourself, ‘cause it would be like like the air around you. You know? [Ross responds affirmatively.] I guess, unless people reflected that to you a lot. If they were like, “I never feel like I can get through to you,” or something, then maybe.
ross
									
So, yeah, can’t really speak to that fully. She said that I’m controlling. I’unno. [Carrie laughs, and responds several times as Ross continues speaking.] Uh, that I’m meant to be a leader. I don’t really see that as part of my personal makeup. I think I’m just too busy doing other things, and I don’t see myself having much bandwidth or inclination to try to lead others.
carrie
									
I do feel like if I did an escape room with several people, you might be the person who naturally emerged to be like, wait, let me get everybody who’s already doing work, let’s collect this into like an overlying pattern that will actually help us succeed.
ross
									
Okay. I did that in a recent escape room, but that was with two people that had never done an escape room before. And we succeeded! [Carrie responds emphatically with “hey!”] In general, I think my philosophy is I’m happy to follow, until like, everybody’s sort of meandering around like, “What do we do?” and I’m like, “Okay, now’s my chance to do it.” She said there are two people standing in my way—
carrie
									
Uh oh!
ross
									
—of things I’m trying to accomplish. I dunno who those people are.
carrie
									
Did you stand in a line recently? Oh, to see Amma. [Ross responds emphatically, saying “oh” multiple times.] There were more than two people though. There were more than two people!
ross
									
So many people stood in my way. Hundreds. Yeah, I dunno what that means. Um, she said that I would be butting heads, and actually I did, for the first time ever actually, butt heads with somebody at work. That never happened before, and you know, it’s resolved now, but I’ll call that a hit. She said that there are two things that I’m trying to accomplish and I think there are two people standing in the way of those projects. So, I’m just gonna say a solid miss on that, because I feel like at the end of the year, I would know, “Oh, that’s what she meant.”
carrie
									
You would know what that meant. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For sure.
ross
									
Okay, so here’s the big one. [Carrie responds emphatically.] It was my big takeaway, and something that was very testable, is that psychic Sister Rocky said that I would be accused of sexual impropriety within the next six months. This was the beginning of January.
carrie
									
Now, before you tell us whether that happened, was this on your mind at all? Did that give you any of the sort of heebie-jeebies about whether this would happen?
ross
									
You know, I’ll say no. I was pretty confident that this was not something that was going to happen, or that had already happened. So, I thought it was kind of silly, and I had no problem talking with people about it, even at work. So, I guess they all knew to have their eyes on me. So, six months went by. Nothing happened, and everybody would say, “Well, not that you know of yet!” [Carrie responds affirmatively.] So they’ve had six months and a change of HR leadership to report me, and nothing has happened that I would recognize as like, “Uh oh, I hope nobody mentions this!” [Carrie laughs.] And nothing has happened in that respect. So, I’m calling it a solid fail. Solid miss.
carrie
									
Okay. There you go.
ross
									
But that was certainly, I think, the most interesting prediction out of all of these. And she was trying to sell me on like, $540 worth of candle work to deal with it. So, good thing I saved that $540.
carrie
									
And, you know, often psychics will use this excuse if their predictions don’t come true, of like, “Well, I can only sort of see likelihoods, and you still have free agency,” and so on. But this was something that was going to happen to you that you had no control over. So, it’s not like your belief or disbelief or you’re making better decisions to do anything.
ross
									
And she got very explicit about it. Even when she was trying to sell me on the candles, she was saying, “Well, we can’t stop this from happening. It’s going to happen no matter what. But we can, you know, maybe help deal with things on the perimeter around that.”
carrie
									
Gosh, I’m trying to put myself in her mind and like, does she really just think, “Oh, this is true of every man. In the next six months, someone will accuse them of sexual impropriety.”
ross
									
Yeah. And certainly the Me Too movement was kind of in the heat of things at the time. So, yeah, who knows what was going on in her head. But it did not pan out, thankfully. Thankfully for all the women around me. Or men. She didn’t specify. She told me not to invest. I mean, I—
carrie
									
In the next six months, right?
ross
									
Yeah. I did put some money in, you know, like one of those accounts that earns like 1.5% or something like that, just to have some money doing something. I did resist investing in a money market account. I was meeting with a financial advisor, and he just kept saying inconsistent things to me. Saying, “This is the best one for you,” and then a few minutes later he’d say, “Yeah, this is the best one for you.” Wait a second, you were pointing at that one just a minute ago. So, I gave up after awhile. But not because of psychic Sister Rocky.
carrie
									
[Laughing] Was that in the first six months?
ross
									
Yeah. It was.
carrie
									
Oh my gosh. Good thing you avoided it.
ross
									
[Sighing] I guess you could. I wasn’t thinking about her at the time.
carrie
									
It’s almost as if these predictions are articulated in such a way that it’s impossible to prove to her wrong.
ross
									
Right. So, I’m just gonna call it a miss. I don’t think that was particularly relevant or interesting. She told me that New York held something positive for me. [Carrie responds emphatically with “yeah!”] It did, yeah! We had a show out in Brooklyn.
carrie
									
That was such a great show.
ross
									
That was great. So, thank you, psychic Sister Rocky. “Don’t move to New York.” Well, I didn’t. [Carrie responds emphatically, shouting “hey!”] So, if I had moved to New York, and something bad had happened, then we’d give her credit for that.
carrie
									
Yeah, I guess. I guess.
ross
									
Yeah, alright. That’s sideways. We can’t say whether that was useful or not. I had no plans to move to New York.
carrie
									
But you didn’t.
ross
									
Something good was gonna come from Colorado. You pointed out that our SoulMalas 528 hertz frequency of love healing set—
carrie
									
Which actually turned out to be 530 hertz.
ross
									
—we ordered it from a company that we later found is based in Colorado, but it shipped from China, so I doubt— [Carrie giggles.] It came from the drop ship company. I don’t think it ever actually went there or got blessed in Colorado, so.
carrie
									
Also, I’m willing to say that was not something good.
ross
									
Okay, so, yeah. I’m saying, yeah, that’s a miss on the Colorado one. Things will generally go well for me in 2019. Yeah.
carrie
									
Okay. I don’t think I even put this together when I was listing back through, but—
ross
									
And yet she had told me I’d be accused of sexual impropriety.
carrie
									
Yeah! You’re gonna be falsely accused of a very serious crime, but it’ll be a good year! [Laughs.]
ross
									
Generally you’ll look back at 2019 and be like, “I’m glad that year happened!” So, I’m guessing some really good stuff had to be going down all the rest of the year, when I wasn’t being accused of sexual impropriety. [Carrie responds affirmatively.] Uh, so at least in this part, she was right. It’s been a good year. I liked 2019. I’m not being fulfilled? Eh, I’m just gonna say miss. I feel plenty fulfilled.
carrie
									
You’re the only person who can say, so.
ross
									
I’m too busy. I don’t have time to feel unfulfilled. [Carrie laughs.] Problems with sleeping and indigestion. Uh, definitely I’ve had some nights where I haven’t slept enough.
carrie
									
You know, you’ve mentioned that a few times, and I—are you having insomnia, or is it just like, you don’t have the time to go to sleep?
ross
									
[Carrie responds affirmatively multiple times.] I just don’t have the time. Yeah. I’ve never suffered insomnia. Like, if I go to bed, I go to bed.
carrie
									
Okay. Yeah. So, not like sleeping problems, more like time problems.
ross
									
Yeah, not like a physical problem sleeping. But, you know, actually, if anything I’ve gotten better at saying like, “I’m tired now. I’m not gonna keep working. I’m gonna go to bed.”
carrie
									
Oh, good, I’m glad to hear that.
ross
									
So, I do that. My sexual chakra was not spinning.
carrie
									
Oh, no.
ross
									
Hopefully it started up again.
carrie
									
Did you have sex this year?
ross
									
Yeah.
carrie
									
[Emphatically] Okay, hey! I didn’t know you lost your virginity this year! That’s great! [Ross laughs.] Congratulations!
ross
									
Kara and I finally decided it was time. She said that my sexual performance is fine, but that I’m detached. Emotionally detached. [Carrie responds emphatically with “goodness”.] Nope, that’s wrong.
carrie
									
What a wide swing to make.
ross
									
Oh man, yeah. After she knew that I had been in my marriage for 18 years. It’s pretty wild.
carrie
									
Yeah, I wonder if it was another one of those, well, you’re a man. So if anything has been related to you negatively in the sex realm, it’s probably gonna be something like, “oh, you don’t cuddle me enough” or something.
ross
									
Mm-hm. Yeah. No, got a good relationship. I was just telling someone recently, like it works out to about every six years Kara and I will have an argument, that like I would actually call an argument.
carrie
									
Oh, wow. Okay. Wow.
ross
									
And uh, we’re, you know, it’s been a long time since we argued about anything. So, uh, no. It’s been a good year in the relationship category. So, wrong.
carrie
									
I’m assuming to you, an argument is like, a pretty big thing then. You must have little like, tiffs. Like, disagreements. [Ross hums in disagreement.] No?
ross
									
Not really. It’s not a thing.
carrie
									
What is happening in that home?
ross
									
No, but I mean, yeah the ones that stand out are definitely like, we’re upset about something big. And you know what? The last one was over the Rhythmia thing. [Carrie responds affirmatively with “oh yeah, sure.”] Yeha, that was the last time we really had a fight fight. Yeah, no. Just generally we’re very happy. Things are going well, so.
carrie
									
Alright! Hey, congrats on that.
ross
									
Suck it. [Carrie laughs.] Uh, vulnerable to substance abuse. Still wrong.
carrie
									
Yeah, no. You are a person for whom that even particularly doesn’t apply, you know what I mean?
ross
									
Yeah, right. There are people for who that would be somewhere in the grey area, but uh, no. Not here. Uh, I’m stubborn? No! [Carrie laughs.] I’m not stubborn. I’m never stubborn. That’s wrong. No, you can’t convince me otherwise. She said that there’s been a void in my life since I was 17.
carrie
									
Yeah, and then, that’s when you met Kara, started dating Kara.
ross
									
Started dating her, yeah. Technically we met when I was 10. But yeah, she just doesn’t like Kara. That’s all there is to it.
carrie
									
Yeah. I think she’s in love with you.
ross
									
Their energies are not meshing. There’s only one way to find out if she’s in love with me.
carrie
									
Marry her?
ross
									
Psychic Sister Rocky?
carrie
									
Yeah.
ross
									
Oh, okay. Uh, I’m gonna move to New York and marry psychic Sister Rocky.
carrie
									
Oh, no, you can’t move to New York! Shit!
ross
									
Oh, no? Oh, boy.
carrie
									
Fudge. But you’re right, she is in New York.
ross
									
Yeah. Hmm, interesting. Okay, we’ll get to that. And uh, that was about it for her readings for me. She said that one of my chakras didn’t need work, which she called my aura. Which is totally weird. [Carrie laughs.] Again, no way to evaluate that statement.
carrie
									
Oh, yeah yeah, ‘cause you called her and said, “Which of my chakras is the one that’s fine?” And she said, “Your aura chakra.”
ross
									
Yeah, which is not...
carrie
									
That’s—that’s not a—we even know that’s not a thing.
ross
									
Not a thing. So, looking at this long list of predictions, there were, let’s see, five things that I would say, yeah, sure, that was a hit. Most of them were pretty inconsequential.
carrie
									
What was the best hit?
ross
									
That I would butt heads at work. [Carrie responds affirmatively with “okay”.] Just because that had never happened before and it did once. I’ll say that’s the best hit. Alright, how did your readings pan out?
carrie
									
I wish I could say, Ross. But, first, I want to tell you how much I love my own teeth.
ross
									
That’s good. I’m glad you love your teeth.
carrie
									
Yeah, you know, I love taking care of them. I love looking at them I love using them to talk, eat, etcetera.
ross
									
[Laughing] You love looking at your teeth?
carrie
									
Yeah! Why not?
ross
									
Cool! Yeah, sure. That’s normal.
carrie
									
[Laughing] There’s an episode of The Mary Tyler Moore Show where Ted is just sitting by himself on the couch, and he just hasn’t talked in awhile. And they’re like, “Hey Ted, what’s up with you?” And he says, “Oh, I’m counting my teeth.” [Both laugh.]
ross
									
That’s a great line. That’s good writing.
carrie
									
Yup. It’s a really well written show.
ross
									
‘Cause it’s not advancing the plot.
carrie
									
Yup. Exactly. It’s like—
ross
									
It’s this little human moment.
carrie
									
Exactly. It’s how things really happen, but just slightly heightened.
ross
									
Tied into the character. Oh, I love it. That’s fun. Well, if you care about your teeth.
carrie
									
I do.
ross
									
And maybe some of our listeners do as well, you probably want to get a toothbrush that is built to all the latest and greatest standards in tooth brushing.
carrie
									
You probably do. And if you do, you should probably get a Quip.
ross
									
Well, hey. The shopping season is here, and this year your gift can start next year’s good habit with Quip! Quip is something that’s sure to put a smile on everyone’s mouth, because it’s dental care that they’ll actually want to use every day.
carrie
									
Quip is the thoughtful and practical gift. It’s intentionally designed to make good habits simple.
ross
									
It’s an electric toothbrush. It has sensitive, sonic vibrations and a timer with 30 second pulses to guide your routine. And the refillable Quip floss dispenser has pre-marked string, so you always use the right amount.
carrie
									
Plus Quip delivers brush heads, floss, and toothpaste refills every three months.
ross
									
So join over three million happy customers and check everyone off your gift list right now with Quip.
carrie
									
I hope Santa brings me a new Quip.
ross
									
Oh yeah?
carrie
									
Because when I moved, I misplaced my Quip.
ross
									
Oh, no!
carrie
									
Yeah. I mean, it’s okay. I’ve been brushing my teeth since, but it’s not the same, as you know.
ross
									
I’d be seriously bummed. So, you can go to GetQuip.com/ohno to save on gift sets and to get your first refill free with a refill plan.
carrie
									
That’s your first refill free at GetQuip.com/ohno.
ross
									
GetQuip.com/ohno.
carrie
									
What are you getting me for Christmas? A website, or? That’s what I really want.
ross
									
Oh, you do?
carrie
									
Yeah.
ross
									
Well, that’s good, because I actually just got you a Squarespace.
carrie
									
[Gasps] That’s my favorite kind of website!
ross
									
Well, you’re in luck, because I found just the right site for you to create your online presence.
carrie
									
Really?
ross
									
Oh, yeah. Well, let me tell you about it. You could use Squarespace if you want to create a blog, or maybe publish content. Maybe you want to promote your physical or online business.
carrie
									
I want to promote my physical or online business.
ross
									
What if you want to announce an upcoming event or special project?
carrie
									
Okay, what about if I’m getting married, say?
ross
									
That’s a special project.
carrie
									
Could I make a website called DrewCarrieShow.com but Carrie spelled C-A-R-R-I-E, and then make it about my wedding? But it’s like very beautiful and high tech, and yet it only takes me, I don’t know, an hour or two to create?
ross
									
I think you could do that, as long as the other Drew Carey Show doesn’t sue you. [Carrie laughs.] Yeah, and you could do it on Squarespace.
carrie
									
Okay, you know what? I think I will. Click, click, click, click. Oh my gosh, I just did!
ross
									
Look at that! You’re using beautiful templates created by world class designers.
carrie
									
And I can use powerful e-commerce functionality if I want to sell items at my wedding!
ross
									
Oh, looks like you even have a new way to buy domains and choose from over 200 extensions.
carrie
									
You know I did. I chose dot com, but I could have.
ross
									
You could have gotten another dot horse.
carrie
									
It’s true. [Laughing] DrewCarrieShow.horse might be pushing it.
ross
									
And there’s 24/7 award winning customer support.
carrie
									
So check out Squarespace.com/ohno for a free trial and when you’re ready to launch, use the offer code OHNO to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. I know I did when I did DrewCarrieShow.com.
ross
									
Oh, yeah! You got that discount, and gave us credit for it!
carrie
									
Yeah. That’s right.
ross
									
So uh, thank you to all of you for signing up if you need a website.
carrie
									
And for looking at my wedding.
ross
									
That’s you guys! It looks great.
carrie
									
Thank you! There’s even an FAQ section.
ross
									
Oh, wow.
carrie
									
Ross’ name is on it.
ross
									
Oh, yeah! Look at me! [Carrie laughs.] I’m an esteemed reader.
carrie
									
Esteemed reader. And look at that, it’s mobile optimized right out of the box. Good god, what a good website.
ross
									
Oh, yeah. You built it beautiful.
carrie
									
I really did. So, you were asking me about Sister Rocky.
ross
									
Yeah. How did her predictions go for you? ‘Cause she had some strong relationship predictions.
carrie
									
She sure—oh yeah, relationship and health predictions. She really went for it with me. So, okay, first she also told me I had a long lifeline. Like you, I didn’t die this year, so.
ross
									
 Woo-hoo! High-five! [Carrie responds emphatically.] We’ll merge our lifelines briefly in a high-five.
carrie
									
[Laughs] She said that I will die of old age, unless I drink a bunch or use a lot of drugs.
ross
									
This is helpful to hear, because in our line of work you never know when we’re gonna like, take a step too far— [Carrie responds affirmatively.] —and one of us has to die. So, uh, that’s good. Assuming we take her word for it.
carrie
									
Unless I drink a bunch, or use a lot of drugs. I mean, use a lot of drugs could also still be in our line of work, but probably not. Anyway, she said there will be problems in my ovarian area this year, but they will be ruled out.
ross
									
I feel like if I were a psychic I would be working in little references to things and see if people notice. I would say, “There will be blood.” [Carrie laughs.] See if anyone’s a fan of the movie.
carrie
									
They’re just a big PT Anderson fan. Actually, that is my favorite director, so I might be like, “Oh! Wow, this is amazing!”
ross
									
Anyway, so yeah. Is that true, Carrie?
carrie
									
No. There was—I mean.
ross
									
You didn’t have any troubles in your ovarian area?
carrie
									
Not that I know of, and certainly none that were then ruled out by a doctor.
ross
									
Yeah, okay. Miss.
carrie
									
Yeah. Miss. She said my energy, though, could make real cancer happen.
ross
									
Did it? Have you been diagnosed with cancer?
carrie
									
No, I haven’t been diagnosed with cancer.
ross
									
Yet.
carrie
									
Miss? Uh, yeah, I guess in the next like week I could be—
ross
									
It’s hard to know what’s raging on inside your body. Hopefully not.
carrie
									
It’s true. Again, maybe the design of the prediction. Okay, then she said I’m a happy go lucky woman, but inside I carry a little sadness.
ross
									
That’s just a Barnum statement. That’s true for me, too.
carrie
									
Yeah, yeah. Oh, this is interesting. When I was making this chart, I see I wrote “unknown”. [Both chuckle.] But um, yeah, sure. I mean, if I didn’t carry a little sadness, I would not be human. Okay, then she said, [Laughing] oh yeah. “Gotten so used to sadness, I don’t even feel it.” Oh, I bet that’s why I went back and put unknown. ‘Cause I thought, “Okay, well, if I wouldn’t even know, then you tell me.”
ross
									
As Donald Rumsfeld would say, that’s one of the unknown unknowns.
carrie
									
Yeah, totally. Okay, then she said I have made a foolish mistake in the past. Oh, right, and at the time I was trying to figure that out. And I was like, well, I guess I only have two things that I return to and say like, “Oh, did I do the right thing there?” And one was not transferring to Berkeley.
ross
									
Oh, because of a boy.
carrie
									
Because of a boy. [Ross responds with “ugh”.] And the other was kind of giving up on my dog Tome who had become just like, super aggressive, and I ended up putting him down.
ross
									
Probably was still the right choice.
carrie
									
I think so. But, you know, those are the sorts of things that you return to every once in awhile.
ross
									
Stick with you. Yeah.
carrie
									
But I said both of those to her, and she was like, “No no, not those.” I was like, “Oh, then I really don’t know.” And then she said, “For some women, it’s an abortion.” I was like, “Okay, well, I haven’t had an abortion, so.”
ross
									
Hashtag not all women.
carrie
									
Yeah. So that was a miss. Okay, she said I will be told I have cancer, but it will be misdiagnosed.
ross
									
Oh, make up your mind, lady.
carrie
									
Yeah. That’s a miss.
ross
									
You know what? That was probably her referring to herself from a few minutes before, where— [Carrie laughs.] —she told me you would have cancer.
carrie
									
Yeah, that’s—you know what?
ross
									
Alright, she just canceled herself out.
carrie
									
That’s the best version you can make of this, so sure. Then she said—this is so confusing. I remember being so confused by this. She said you’ll be told you have cancer, but it’s gonna be misdiagnosed, but also the cancer will be healed.
ross
									
Hmm. Okay. There’s the false cancer, there’s the real cancer. The real cancer will be healed.
carrie
									
Maybe she’s hoping that as you recall this, you won’t be going through it with a fine-tooth comb the way we are, and you’ll just remember like, “Oh, she said something about me having cancer and it turning out okay.”
ross
									
And didn’t worry about her own internal inconsistency there. Okay.
carrie
									
But anyway, there was no mention of cancer from my doctors, and I do get pretty thoroughly examined every year since there’s like, a lot of cancer in my family. So.
ross
									
Okay. Fail.
carrie
									
I think that’s a miss. She did say that higher power will bless me this year.
ross
									
Well, you got blessed briefly by Amma. [Carrie responds emphatically, repeating “okay”.] She’s kind of one with the supreme reality.
carrie
									
You’re right. She is God, so alright, we’ll call that a hit. Writing hit.
ross
									
[Laughs] You’re welcome, psychic Sister Rocky. I’m fighting for you.
carrie
									
We’re giving you the best possible version of yourself. Alright, then she said I should be grateful but I shouldn’t shout it from the rooftops. I guess that’s what I’m doing.
ross
									
Did you get on a rooftop?
carrie
									
I haven’t been on a roof all year, I’m pretty sure. I’m trying to think of a time I was on a roof.
ross
									
I’m trying to think of a time I was on a roof. Usually I’m on a roof.
carrie
									
Yeah, it’s kind of interesting. I would think I could think of some rooftop time. Probably, I probably parked in a parking structure on the roof.
ross
									
Oh, sure. Of course. Yeah, that happened. I didn’t shout anything up there, though.
carrie
									
Yeah, me neither. So. Okay, yeah. But I do feel grateful. My life is going very well, thank you very much. Now I need to be more grateful for myself, she says. Maybe.
ross
									
Yeah, that’s not even a prediction, that’s just sort of—
carrie
									
Advice. Yeah. Which, I mean, people do turn to psychics for. But could I say that I have like a deficit of gratitude for myself? I really don’t know. She said that I have no feeling in my inner soul, which—you know what? That’s true. There are no nerve endings there. [Both giggle.] I have no feeling in my inner soul.
ross
									
That’s true. Yeah, we do know where the inner soul is located on the body, and there are no nerve endings there.
carrie
									
[Laughs] Yeah. That’s such an unprovable—how do I know that I don’t have feeling in that thing? [Frustrated yelp.] Anyway, okay. Then she said that my life purpose is to bring excitement to other people. I felt like that’s—that’s fine. Like, you know, part of my job is like, performing and stuff. So sure. But I do also feel like she probably is like, “Fairly chipper person in LA? This’ll hit.” [Ross responds affirmatively.] Okay, then she said my flesh needs to fly so that soul energy can take control.
ross
									
Oh yeah, that was like the almost creepy thing, where it almost sounded like some weird physical threat or like—
carrie
									
Right, it almost sounds like the way you’d talk—like a mahasamadhi—like the way you’d talk about a spiritual person leaving the body.
ross
									
You need to shed your mortal coil.
carrie
									
Right. On a new plane now.
ross
									
So did that happen?
carrie
									
Uh, no. I’ve been keeping my flesh really close to me
ross
									
It didn’t fly? Okay.
carrie
									
Okay, then we hit a pretty strong string of misses here. [Ross laughs and responds affirmatively as Carrie speaks.] Yeah, so she said that I keep opinions to myself. I wouldn’t say that’s right. You know, certainly not more than other people. She said there was a jealous woman around me. If there is, I don’t know about it.
ross
									
And she was gonna try to steal Drew away from you.
carrie
									
Yeah. So the jealous woman will try to make it seem like something has happened between her and Drew. The implication seemed to be sleeping together, but I’m not sure she actually said sleeping together. That hasn’t happened. No woman has come to me and said that.
ross
									
I guess we need to add a proviso here. We’re mid-December as we’re recording this, so.
carrie
									
Oh yeah, all of this could happen in the next like, two weeks.
ross
									
We will definitely let you know if all of this comes true in the last two weeks of the year. You know, that’s 1/26th of the year. That’s like, 4% of the year.
carrie
									
Okay. Yeah. She said that this woman who comes forward, she will be lying. Drew rejected her, and she’s mad about that, and that’s why she’s saying that Drew slept with her or whatever. But it’s not true.
ross
									
Just sounds like very creative storytelling on Sister Rocky’s part.
carrie
									
Yeah, totally. I feel like maybe, you know, as she sees that nothing’s landing with me, she’s just sort of broadening the story a little and making it seem a little more plausible, you know? If she had just been like, “There’s a jealous woman,” and I’d have been like, “Yeah, yeah,” then she’d know, okay, maybe this relationship’s a little rocky.
ross
									
I feel like these were the two items that were from her grab bag of tricks. Oh, I’m talking to a woman, we’re going to talk about another woman stepping in. And oh, we’re talking to a man, we’re gonna talk about you getting outed for sexual impropriety. [Carrie responds affirmatively.] She probably has a few others, but I’m guessing this is her little go-to.
carrie
									
I think so.
ross
									
I want to alert this person, make them worried, and make them think they need my help.
carrie
									
Right, and hopefully something that’s already sort of on their mind. So, if I believe this woman’s lies, my relationship will falter. Still a miss. I’m gonna meet the woman this year. So, apparently it’s not a woman I already knew at that point.
ross
									
Wow. This is gonna be a busy two weeks for you.
carrie
									
[Laughs] Yeah, I don’t think I’ve met her yet. But I need to have faith in a higher power over this, and especially I need to have faith in a higher power so that I don’t get cancer.
ross
									
Are you still an atheist?
carrie
									
I still don’t believe in a—yeah. Unless by higher power she means like, democracy or something. Truth.
ross
									
The American way.
carrie
									
And then she said, oh okay. She straight up said my uterine wall and fallopian tubes will get cancer.
ross
									
Well, who knows where they are right now.
carrie
									
[Laughing] Yeah. If you have my fallopian tubes, please check them and see if they make water taste just a little sweet. [Both laugh.]
ross
									
I was just thinking that.
carrie
									
But yeah. As far as I know, my uterus is fine, and it got checked this year, as it does every year, so. She did say I may later need a hysterectomy. Just go ahead and do it! Okay. She said my—
ross
									
What a horrible way to get that advice.
carrie
									
[Laughing] Yeah, I know! It’s like decent advice, but you don’t actually know anything about my life. You just happen to hit upon some decent advice.
ross
									
Yeah, there’s no way in which she should be telling people that.
carrie
									
That’s correct. Then she said that my cancer will actually be caused by a spiritual problem. And I will have cancer in the next six months if I don’t get a healing from...
crosstalk
									
Ross & Carrie: [In unison] Sister Rocky!
ross
									
And you didn’t.
carrie
									
I didn’t!
ross
									
You didn’t pay that extra money.
carrie
									
I did not. And, you know what? Still doing fine.
ross
									
Hey, that six months is definitely expired.
carrie
									
Oh, for sure.
ross
									
Miss.
carrie
									
And then some. So, in particular I needed a power animal to eat my illness. That’s weird.
ross
									
Is that a thing?
carrie
									
A power animal?
ross
									
Eating your illness?
carrie
									
Oh, yeah. I think at the time I asked her that. Like, oh, I haven’t associated that with power animals. But I guess yeah.
ross
									
Okay, my psychic fox, climb down to my psychic spleen and eat it.
carrie
									
[Laughs] What’s the hungriest animal, a hippo? Hungry hungry hippo?
ross
									
I hear hippos do kill a lot of people.
carrie
									
Oh, that’s true. Yeah yeah, I think it’s the most dangerous land mammal, right? Anyway, so she wanted to give me a candle healing that would help me get my spirit animal. That’s normally $220, but she’s willing to give it to me for $120. But I still decided I was gonna risk it, and here I am.
ross
									
Boy, $120. That was my full price for just one chakra, so, really she was offering you a steal.
carrie
									
Yeah, that’s true. I wonder then if my chakras are fine, or if this was just like a triage situation where this was more important or what. Hmm, interesting.
ross
									
Or she felt like somehow I was mister moneybags.
carrie
									
Mm-hm, mm-hm. So then she said you and I collaborate creatively.
ross
									
Correct.
carrie
									
True. Now, do you think she got that from you, from your conversation?
ross
									
Oh, I don’t think I said anything that would give away that we have a project together, so I’ll call that a hit.
carrie
									
Okay. Hard to remember this far out. Then, okay. Then I tried to get her to say what would happen with Trump this year, and she just, she wouldn’t comment on it. She’s like, “Oh, I just can’t say. I can’t say.”
ross
									
I mean, that’s fair. Even he doesn’t know what he’s gonna do next.
carrie
									
[Laughing] True. So she didn’t get anything wrong there, so fine. Apparently at some point I said that I think Trump is a psychopath and she agreed. So, I’m gonna call that a hit. [Ross responds emphatically.] Oh yeah, then she got on that kick of just trying to give me advice about my book that I did not want. Yeah, so she told me to make a clear point in my book. Great, good advice. Okay, she said 2019 is the year of Carrie taking less control. I don’t know what that means, so I’m gonna call it a miss.
ross
									
And I don’t think that characterizes your year. You made some big decisions.
carrie
									
Yeah, that’s true. Yeah. Um, okay. This one’s a little tricky. She said my three and a half year relationship is getting stronger. We did break up after this. Um, we got back together. I dunno, that feels like a miss because it was before the break up. But I’m sure she would say grey area, so I will too.
ross
									
It would be a hitty kind of miss. [Carrie laughs.] It’s an unusual situation.
carrie
									
Yeah. Um, then—but, she said, this is the big hit. We will have a new commitment coming forward this year.
ross
									
Hey. Okay, and that’s the one listeners remembered.
carrie
									
Yup, exactly. And I get it. I get why. I mean, getting engaged, that’s a thing that hopefully happens just once in your life. Then she said that Drew and I would start thinking about adopting another dog. Hasn’t happened.
ross
									
Okay. Seems like a fair guess.
carrie
									
Yeah, if you’ve got the one. Then she said Drew and I would take a step further toward marriage. Hit, definitely. Okay, then she said we would adopt another dog very soon. She said one to two years. So, the two years aren’t up yet. So far, not even looking. And she said adopt, don’t buy the dog.
ross
									
Well, duh. Always adopt.
carrie
									
Yeah. Definitely. Definitely what we would do if we were going to go get a dog. Oh, yeah. She said to tell Drew if I want to get married. Don’t hold it in. I did that.
ross
									
Yeah, you did.
carrie
									
[Laughing] On his podcast.
ross
									
Solid hit.
carrie
									
Okay, then she let me know that Ella would do fine with the new dog that I’m getting. Okay, who knows. Oh yeah, she told me not to wait another year to come see her again. That it’s like counseling, I need to keep coming back.
ross
									
[Laughing] Of course. So that definitely serves her purposes.
carrie
									
Yup. I’m gonna call that a hit. Year was fine, and all the things that she thought would happen that were bad didn’t. So, eh. Oh yeah, so then she got off on this weird tangent where she seemed to be convinced I was writing a book about Donald Trump, which I was not and am not. But, she was like, “You need to get to Bethesda this year. Get near D.C., you know, so you can really get there and with him. But, do not move to Washington, D.C.” And you know what? I haven’t.
ross
									
Hey. Alright, good job. Imagine all the terrible things that would happen if you moved there.
carrie
									
Yeah, who even knows. So let’s see. I’ve got one, two… [Carrie counts upwards to 18.] About 18 things I’m calling a miss. Hits, we got one, two, three, four… about five. Six. About seven solid hits. So, much bigger miss quota.
ross
									
Okay, let’s see here. Seven divided by 25, the total number. So, out of the ones that could be evaluated, eh, about a quarter were hits. Eh, not bad. Actually, bad.
carrie
									
[Laughs] Bad if you’re supposed to be actually telling the future.
ross
									
Have special dispensation from the psychic world.
carrie
									
Yeah. And how about you, how’s your ratio?
ross
									
Horatio Hornblower, he’s doing well.
carrie
									
Who is that?
ross
									
He’s uh, it’s like a fictional character, but there’s all these adventures of him on the high seas. Very few people will know that reference. Okay. [Carrie laughs.] Five hits out of 22 total evaluable statements. Little lower, 22%-23% if you want to round up. So yeah, not so great there.
carrie
									
And we’re also not counting up the sort of unknown ones, which probably equal in amount.
ross
									
Like she just got a bunch of credit for telling me that I’m a realist.
carrie
									
Right, and for saying that Trump is a psychopath. I agree. [Ross laughs.] Yeah, so we thought we would go back to Sister Rocky and we’d kind of go over this with her and be like, “What do you think? Why are there so many misses, what’s up?” Right?
ross
									
Yeah, we were looking forward to trying to see how she’d respond to this. So, turns out she did not take her advice for me to not go to New York. You came by that same storefront to see if you could see her.
carrie
									
Yeah! And I noticed that it seemed like the decorations were different, but I was like, “Maybe I just don’t remember it correctly.”
ross
									
She could have updated.
carrie
									
Yeah. So, but I called the number on the sign outside. I got a different woman, and I thought, “Maybe this is the same lady, but maybe I just don’t remember her voice, and—”
ross
									
Still a psychic shop though.
carrie
									
Yeah. It’s called Bella Vida’s Psychic now. So yeah, I said, “Oh hi, I was wondering what your hours are,” and she told me. And I said, “Okay, cool. And uh, I’ve been there once before, but remind me of your name?” And she said something like Laura or Gabriella. Yeah, a name that was not at all like Rocky. [Ross responds emphatically.] And I was like, “Oh, okay. The last time I went there, it was a woman named Rocky? Sister Rocky?” And she said, “Oh, uh, when did you come?” And I was like, “Uh, you know, a good year ago.” And she’s like, “Oh, okay. I know there was another psychic here, but I’d never heard her name.”
ross
									
Oh, weird. How does that go down?
carrie
									
Well, you know I went down that rabbit hole. How does that go down? [Laughs] It turns out there’s a guy named Mark Nicholas who just sort of like, buys storefront psychic shops and then rents them out. That’s how it appears, anyway.
ross
									
Interesting, okay. So these are just people renting out from him.
carrie
									
[Ross responds affirmatively multiple times as Carrie speaks.] Yeah, and I think he also fancies himself a medium. I’m only getting this from following like, a bunch of LinkedIn trails, so I might have details wrong here. But that’s certainly how it looks. Yeah, weird. So I went and found Sister Rocky’s cell phone number again, and called her, and I thought, “You know, maybe she’ll give me a phone reading or something.” This did not go the way I planned.
clip
									
[Clip of phone conversation between Carrie and Sister Rocky.] Both, simultaneous: Hello? Sister Rocky: Yes, can I help you? Carrie: Oh, sorry. I was trying to find Sister Rocky. Sister Rocky: Yes, can I help you? Carrie: Oh, right! Um, I saw you, um, uh, the last time I was in town, and you used to work at Wilton in Hollywood, right? Sister Rocky: Yes. Carrie: Are you not there anymore? Sister Rocky: No. Carrie: Are you still seeing clients? Sister Rocky: Uh, I could do a reading over the phone. What kind of reading did I do for you last time? Carrie: Um, it was like a palmistry and tarot reading. Sister Rocky: Okay, and what is your name? Carrie: Carrie. Sister Rocky: Carrie? Okay, yeah. You came in with a gentleman? Carrie: [Emphatically] Yeah! Sister Rocky: Yeah, how you doing, sweetie? Carrie: I’m pretty good. How do you remember that? Sister Rocky: Uh, because you made a blog about me, that’s why. Carrie: Okay. Alright. I wondered about that, okay. Sister Rocky: Mm, yeah. Carrie: Uh, what do you think of that? Sister Rocky: Mm. What did I think about it? I think you just like, overdid your part. Carrie: What does that mean? Sister Rocky: Meaning a lot that I was saying, you just, you know, overacted a little bit more than what I told you. Carrie: Okay. Well, I wanted to get your impression. I wrote down all the things you said would happen, and, you know, a lot of them didn’t happen. And I don’t know, I was just kind of curious what you thought about that. Sister Rocky: Mm-hm. Okay. Well, actually, I’m not there. I’m in New York City. Carrie: Okay. Sister Rocky: And as far as to do a reading like that, I don’t have time. And to tell you the truth, I really don’t want to read for you. Carrie: Okay. Well, and why do you think that so many of your predictions didn’t come true? Sister Rocky: I’m not saying that, whether they came true or not, I just said that you’re a stubborn woman, that your energy is very off. That’s why. Carrie: Okay, but I’m asking you like, last year, you know, you said that several things would happen this year that didn’t happen. Why do you think that is? Sister Rocky: You have free will. That’s why. Carrie: No— Sister Rocky: I’m just the mediator. At the end of the day, it’s based on your decisions and what you make possible, and like I said, I’m the mediator. There could be many different directions that you could go into, like I’ve told you. Carrie: Right, but some of them were things I wouldn’t have control over. Like, health things. Sister Rocky: Well, it’s based on whether you have a little bit more faith, being that you don’t have faith, and you pre-exist everything that you do and you’re a realist, there’s a difference. Carrie: So, if I did have faith, I would have gotten cancer this year, but since I don’t, I didn’t?
ross
									
Okay, wow. [Carrie laughs.] That was my first time hearing that. Oh my goodness. Uh, yeah. So, she hung up on you then.
carrie
									
Yeah. So if I had had faith, her horrible predictions about my life would have come true.
ross
									
So faith can kill.
carrie
									
That’s correct. I was saved by not believing.
ross
									
Huh. That’s interesting. That often comes up, like in spiritual context, you know, where people who don’t believe in ghosts don’t see them. You know, you have to believe it to see it, in many of the—not just ghosts, but many of these phenomena. You know, so it’s like, well, kind of good not to believe in it then. Then you’re not vulnerable to curses, or hauntings, or all kinds of terrible things.
carrie
									
Yeah. Usually this is attached to something that’s just unequivocally good, you know. Oh, you couldn’t feel the Reiki because you don’t believe.
ross
									
And she said something like your soul was lost, or your energy is lost.
carrie
									
Yeah, my energy is lost. I’m a very stubborn woman, and my energy is lost. Hey, we’re both stubborn.
ross
									
Boy, that was uh, that was quite the conversation. I felt my heart rate go up listening to that.
carrie
									
My heart rate was beating so fast afterward. I texted our friend, Chris Stedman, ‘cause I was already chatting with him, and I was like, “Oh my god, Chris, my heart, my heart!”
ross
									
Should have pulled up one of those apps just to see. But you handled it very well. I feel like you were way more present in the moment than I would have been, to like kind of quickly turn around and pose good questions to her.
carrie
									
Oh, thank you!
ross
									
But that was uh, yeah, that was super uncomfortable.
carrie
									
Oh, it was very uncomfortable. And then, so I didn’t want to spoil this for you. So you and I were texting and I was like, “Oh, I just talked to Sister Rocky, it was weird.” And you’re like, “Should I call her?”
ross
									
Should I call her, or would that not go so well?
carrie
									
[Making strained sounds] Up to you! Do you want to call her?
ross
									
So, interesting. So you have free will. Everybody has free will. So, essentially she just invalidated all of her readings, all of her predictions. If they go as planned, she’ll take credit for them. If they don’t, “Eh, you have free will.”
carrie
									
Yeah. I mean, this is always like a problem with—
ross
									
There’s no accountability whatsoever.
carrie
									
Yeah, I mean there’s some fairness to that, right? Like, an economist predicting the future would say like, “Oh, this is just like, what the—”
ross
									
Model shows.
carrie
									
Yeah, yeah, or the 2016 election, right? What happened was still within the margin of error, it wasn’t totally unaccountable.
ross
									
It wasn’t—FiveThirtyEight wasn’t saying there was a zero percent chance of Trump winning. There was a 12.5% chance.
carrie
									
And here we are, living that 12.5 glorious percent. Yeah, so that’s kind of tough, but I want more than that out of a psychic, right? If I were just going to use the models that are already out there, and reachable by sociology and economics and all these things that are actually tested and validated that there are many minds working on, then why should I turn to you?
ross
									
It would be fun to work out with, I don’t know, a combination of actuarial tables and measurable levels of income, and numbers of relationships in a person’s life. Like, I bet you could get some pretty good factors together, and make some worthwhile predictions. [Carrie responds affirmatively.] That might be something fun to work on.
carrie
									
It reminds me of a book I just read. Since I’m getting married, obviously I need to read The Science of Marriage.
ross
									
Oh, yeah. Obviously.
carrie
									
[Laughs] You need to be prepared for these things. Anyway, you know what one of the biggest predictors of whether you’ll get a divorce is?
ross
									
Let me think about this.
carrie
									
Okay. It might have been the biggest one named in the book, at least.
ross
									
Okay, I feel like, one avenue I’m thinking of is like, communication habits. And another thing I’m thinking of is around like, physical intimacy. Not even purely sexual, but just like, how people relate on that level. But, I don’t have anything more specific than that.
carrie
									
You did pick two things that are probably harder to quantify. Well, I guess physical intimacy might be easier to quantify. So, you know, I don’t know if those things were tested. But, whether you’re over 25 when you get married is like, the biggest predictor. [Ross responds emphatically with “oh”.] People who get married for the first time when they’re over 25, the divorce rate is like under 20%.
ross
									
Okay. Interesting. And people are generally these days waiting longer to get married, so uh, I guess that’s a good sign for marriage.
carrie
									
If you’re over 25 and have an undergrad degree, your rate of divorce is like, really really low.
ross
									
Yeah. Oh, okay. That all makes sense and resonates with other statistics I’ve heard. But my mind didn’t go there. That’s really cool.
carrie
									
Yeah. Anyway, I’m starting to think she’s not psychic.
ross
									
Indeed. So we’ve definitely got a hard pass on psychic Sister Rocky.
carrie
									
Yeah, I don’t think she wants to be our friend. I don’t think she’s interested in you romantically anymore, but if you want to give her a call.
ross
									
We could have had a great thing, psychic Sister Rocky.
carrie
									
Do you want to call her, or?
ross
									
Nah. [Carrie laughs.] I mean...
carrie
									
Ross thinks, he ponders.
ross
									
It’s not even that I’m trying to avoid the discomfort, it’s just I’m trying to think, what—
carrie
									
What’s the goal?
ross
									
—positive could come from it, yeah. Why would I want to put her through that discomfort? I think I know what will happen. Are you still telling other men that they’re going to be accused of sexual impropriety? I wonder if she’s living in New York, or she just happens to be there at the moment.
carrie
									
Yeah. Don’t know. But she offered me a reading, until she knew who I was, and then she was too busy.
ross
									
Well, I wish her well, and a different line of business.
carrie
									
Yeah. Me too. Maybe she should go into writing a book about Trump.
ross
									
And if so, she needs to move to D.C.
carrie
									
She—no! Bethesda. If you’re listening to this, Sister Rocky, that’s our advice. Move to Bethesda.
ross
									
And uh, take a different line of work.
carrie
									
I have an idea. For 2020, what if you and I make some predictions? Write them down on a piece of paper and see if we do as well as some of these psychics do?
ross
									
Okay. Now, are these gonna be like, about our lives, or are they gonna be about just the world in general?
carrie
									
Let’s do both. [Ross responds affirmatively.] Okay, so I’m pulling up a Google document. Okay, Ross and—do you hear me typing, listeners? This is behind the scenes shit. Ross and Carrie’s predictions for 2020.
ross
									
I’m trying to think what I can do that’s like, Ross would not do this on air.
carrie
									
[Laughs] Take a drink of water.
ross
									
[Fakes slurping sound.] I don’t have any water right now. I’ll take more spritzes of the stuff.
carrie
									
Okay, and uh, we can go girl-boy-girl-boy. So let’s see. My first prediction will be—
ross
									
Kara wants to try a new pizza place and see Dark Waters.
carrie
									
Okay, you want that to be your first prediction? Kara—
ross
									
That I’ll see Dark Waters. Nope.
carrie
									
Okay. My first one is going to be that—okay, I’m gonna go for it. I’m gonna be a little optimistic here. I’m gonna say the Dem nomination does not go to Biden.
ross
									
Oh. Okay. I don’t have anything particularly against Biden, but I hope that’s true.
carrie
									
Yeah. And hopefully not Marianne Williamson either. [Ross laughs.] But, if you’re listening, Biden or Willamson, come on the show! Talk to us about science, talk to us about eduction. Let’s do this. Anybody with a decent sized following who’s running for president, if you wanna come on the show, we’ll have you. Any party.
ross
									
Alright, so you’re saying not Biden.
carrie
									
Yeah. You wanna get more specific? Or, you could say Biden, then one of us wins.
ross
									
I’ll say Warren or Buttigieg.
carrie
									
Okay. The Dem nomination goes to Warren or Buttigieg. Which, did I spell it right? You would know.
ross
									
You did.
carrie
									
Alright! I’m gonna say a peacock makes national news. [Laughs.]
ross
									
That’s a great prediction.
carrie
									
Thank you. If it happens, oh my god, I’ll be so pleased.
ross
									
[Laughs] Yeah, it’s not out of the realm of possibility, but it is highly specific. It has not happened in my knowledge.
carrie
									
A minute. [Both laugh.]
ross
									
NBC redesigns logo.
carrie
									
Actually, I do think there was someone who tried to take a peacock on a plane as an emotional support animal, which I actually think was like, a right-wing person trying to make a point and be a dick. [Ross responds affirmatively.] But I’m not sure if that made national news or just LA news.
ross
									
Okay. Let’s go the earthquake route. I’m gonna say there’s going to be a major earthquake, I’m gonna say over 7.0 on the west coast.
carrie
									
Oh, wow. Okay.
ross
									
I think that is rare enough that it’s an actual prediction, and watch, it’s like a 6.9. I feel bad even saying something like that, ‘cause then I know there's gonna be property damage, and hopefully our listeners understand the lack of causation.
carrie
									
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, and isn’t that interesting though, that we kind of put together like, “I hope that will happen” and “I think that will happen.” Those feel like the same, but they are not. Carrie. I’ll say someone close to Ross breaks a toe.
ross
									
Okay. Uh, I’m gonna say a new social media platform rises to like, the level of a Twitter or a Facebook.
carrie
									
Okay. Good one.
ross
									
Carrie is thankfully, furiously typing all of these things for us.
carrie
									
Mm-hm. Okay, I’m gonna say—this is also a little bit of me hoping along with me predicting—but my favorite person, Dick Van Dyke, he just turned 94 yesterday, as we’re recording this, so I’m gonna say Dick Van Dyke turns 95.
ross
									
Okay. Somebody posted that, and Carrie’s like, “Well that’s a day old, it was yesterday.” Which, of course, she would know. I always have this moment of panic like, “Oh no, it’s a headline with a picture of smiling Dick Van Dyke! Don’t tell me, don’t tell me!”
carrie
									
You wanna know how present that is in my mind? One time I was at Drew’s house and nothing was happening. We were just in separate rooms. And I heard Drew go, “Oh no, hon.” And I said, “Is it Dick Van Dyke?” He was like, “No, Ella got your retainer.” [Both laugh.]
ross
									
Okay, well, now that I’ve thought about Dick Van Dyke leaving this world, that’s okay.
carrie
									
That is exactly how it was! It was my night guard, and that’s like a $400 item. And so I was like, “But Dick Van Dyke is okay!”
ross
									
If I found out, I wouldn’t tell you. ‘Cause I know you would find out, but I would not want to be the one to tell you.
carrie
									
Let him be alive a few more minutes for me.
ross
									
Exactly. [Laughs] I can just see everyone around you like, trying systematically to—”Carrie, let’s quickly go on a week-long retreat!” [Carrie laughs.] “A silent retreat in the woods! No cell service!” Oh, let’s see, I should have been working on another prediction in the meantime. Do we want to make a prediction on the impeachment? I’m sorry everybody, we’re talking politics, this is—
carrie
									
Nah, it’s fine.
ross
									
—these are trying times. Alright, I hate it, but I’m gonna say the senate does not vote to remove Trump from office.
carrie
									
Think that’s safe.
ross
									
Yeah, I’m making a safe bet there.
carrie
									
Okay, I’m gonna say there is a recount, no matter what the outcome is. [Ross responds emphatically with “interesting”.] There’s a recount of the 2020 U.S. presidential election.
ross
									
And if that process involves a peacock, then we knocked this one out of the effing park.
carrie
									
An earthquake triggers a recount done by a peacock.
ross
									
Okay, I’m gonna say that we have our first major news about a city needing to relocate due to rising water levels.
carrie
									
Oh, wow. A whole city. Okay. Need to relocate because of—
ross
									
I mean, already there’s really bad news around Venice, yeah. I’m gonna guess there’s gonna be like, some major thing, like a bunch of people displaced.
carrie
									
Okay. I’m gonna say, I think that we are very, very close to an AIDs vaccine. [Ross responds emphatically.] So, I’m gonna say an AIDs vaccine is successfully sent to clinical trials. Not widely available, but clinical trials.
ross
									
Oh, I told you, I’m on a clinical trial myself now. [Carrie affirms emphatically.] Yeah, it’s a third stage clinical trial, looking at a potential treatment for eczema, to reduce itching.
carrie
									
[Sarcastic] I didn’t know you have eczema.
ross
									
Ha. So I’ve gone off my meds for awhile to let my foot get as bad as it wants to, just so I can start taking this drug.
carrie
									
Good science.
ross
									
Yeah, I was really excited about this, just ‘cause I want to see what the process is.
carrie
									
Yeah, I’ve applied to many clinical trials. But they’re always trying to isolate that particular complaint, and they’ll be like, “You don’t have anything else wrong with you, do you?” And I’m like, “Oh, get a clipboard.”
ross
									
I guess I’m pretty good for that, ‘cause generally I’m well otherwise. So, I’m sure I’ll have more to report about that. I’m gonna say there’s gonna be something major about malaria, like the reduction of rates of malaria. There will be some big breakthrough.
carrie
									
Okay, so major good news about malaria.
ross
									
Like, you know, drastically reduces the numbers.
carrie
									
Reducing the numbers of infections or deaths?
ross
									
Uh, let’s say deaths. Obviously the two are tied.
carrie
									
I misspoke earlier when I said AIDs vaccine, I just want to note, of course I mean HIV vaccine.
ross
									
Oh, right. It’s amazing that uh, already that infection is not a death sentence. That shows the power of medicine. Yes, there are problems within the medical community and pricing and all of that, but still we get some actual, real lives saved with medical technology.
carrie
									
And I feel like that’s our generation’s polio. Like, we really got to see that happen. ‘Cause I remember in like fourth or fifth grade, people would talk about HIV/AIDS a lot, and there was so much fear around it. It was just this monster hanging over the country, and now it’s like a pretty livable thing.
ross
									
Yeah, and I have friends who lost so many of their friends. Yeah. So, making progress.
carrie
									
Good job, science. Okay, I’m gonna say someone Carrie is close to adopts an amphibian or reptile.
ross
									
I’m gonna say that there will be some major either meme or news item or something revolving around the number 27. The number 27’s gonna have a good year.
carrie
									
I like it. Okay, one of Scientology’s major members, you know, public members—
ross
									
Yeah, one that we know.
carrie
									
—will defect.
ross
									
Speaking of which, turns out Beck is not a Scientologist. At least, as of now. There was an interview recently where he said, “Oh, there’s kind of a misconception about that, but no, I’m not a Scientologist.” [Carrie responds affirmatively.] Uh, alright. I’m gonna say we see our first cloned meat product available to the mass market.
carrie
									
On the consumer market. Okay.
ross
									
So, maybe one of the major fast food restaurants has like, a cloned meat item. [Carrie responds emphatically.] Yeah, so as opposed to something like the Impossible Burger or Beyond Meat that is a facsimile. It’s gonna be made of actual cloned or in vitro meat. Which has been kind of a holy grail of sorts, or something that’s been tested with but they haven't figured out a lot of things around texturing and mass production and stuff.
carrie
									
But you’re saying at a fast food joint even. Will be available—
ross
									
Let’s go bold.
carrie
									
—at a fast food joint. Cool. I think these are some good predictions. How did psychics do in general this year with predicting?
ross
									
I found one list that had a bunch of celebrity predictions put together by the National Enquirer. [Carrie responds emphatically.] This was at the beginning of 2019. And so, let’s see if we can even evaluate these. I don’t know if I’ll know who these people all are. Okay, this was from National Enquirer—
carrie
									
Okay, I’m ready to Google.
ross
									
—and apparently they have their own stable of respected psychics that they talk to, so. They did not name exactly who was making the predictions.
carrie
									
Yeah, certainly it’s not just whoever was tasked with putting this blog together.
ross
									
Mm-hm. So, Lady Gaga will exchange vows with her fiancé, talent agent Christian Karino, after she wins the academy award for her role in A Star Is Born. Now, that’s interesting, because she did win for the song, but not for best actress.
carrie
									
And she and that guy split up.
ross
									
Okay, fail. This same prediction also says that former Today Show host Matt Lauer will announce a return to TV news with a deeply scaled down cable news program that shows how far he’s fallen.
carrie
									
Um, okay. “Matt Lauer returns to the public eye in daughter Romy’s TikTok videos.” [Both chuckle.]
ross
									
Okay, that doesn’t count. Uh, number two, Dolly Parton will reveal she’s leaving long-time husband Carl Dean, who has not been seen with her in years, exclamation mark. Boy, Shelly Miscavige hasn’t been seen with David Miscavige in many years. [Carrie responds affirmatively.] Don’t know what’s up with her.
carrie
									
Okay. October 1st, 2019, Dolly Parton has a new revelation about her long marriage.
ross
									
Yeah?
carrie
									
“Dolly Parton is rarely seen with her husband by her side, but that doesn’t mean he hasn’t been behind the scenes for the majority of her career. Parton and her husband, Carl Dean, have been married more than 50 years, but getting to that milestone hasn’t always been an easy road to travel. In her recently released book, Dolly on Dolly: Interviews and Encounters with Dolly Parton, she shared some surprising revelations…” Here we go!
ross
									
Do tell!
carrie
									
She moved to Nashville when she graduated.
ross
									
Look, I don’t need her life story.
carrie
									
[Laughs] Right. Wow, she’s so cute. Okay. He’s very private. Well, I can tell you one thing, given the length of this article I really doubt at the end they’re gonna drop on us that they’re divorced.
ross
									
Yeah, do a search for the word “divorce” or “leave”.
carrie
									
Okay. [Laughs] “Leave the house”, okay. “Refused to leave Carl.” They renewed their vows.
ross
									
[Laughs] Alright, fail.
carrie
									
And she said that the secret to their marriage is all the time they spend apart.
ross
									
Fail for the psychic, not for them. Good for them. Okay, they’ve got a healthy distance. That is part of a relationship, having, sometimes, your own space. Uh, Gwen Stefani and Blake Shelton’s relationship will be torn apart after their efforts to adopt together go sour. I did not know that relationship existed. [Carrie laughs.] She’s not with Gavin Rossdale anymore? See, I knew that.
carrie
									
Gosh. Okay. Well, People magazine says they’re ready to wed, while International Business Times says they might not be on good terms, while Radar Online says there are wedding rumors.
ross
									
Well, that doesn’t count as torn apart, so, fail.
carrie
									
You’re right. Oh, and People says they’re more in love than ever, but can’t tie the knot just yet.
ross
									
Okay, so that one was wrong as well. Britain's duchess Meghan Markle will have a—that’s Meghan with an ‘h’—will have a baby girl and announce she is pregnant with a second child less than two months after the birth.
carrie
									
Oh, wow. Well, they did have a child.
ross
									
Did they?
carrie
									
Yeah, this last year.
ross
									
Okay, and it is a…?
carrie
									
I don’t remember. This—you know what, I’m proud of us that we don’t know.
ross
									
I’m actively disinterested in royalty.
carrie
									
Yeah, it’s not my thing, either. My mom was very into it, and was just blown away by the fact that I hadn’t been following it. “Royal baby: Meghan Markle and Prince Harry ‘almost certain’ to announce pregnancy in 2020,” says someone. Woah. Baby Archie was born in May of this year. So, she did—
ross
									
Oh, that was a boy.
carrie
									
Uh, yup. It was a boy.
ross
									
Okay, the prediction was that they would have a baby girl.
carrie
									
Okay, that didn’t happen, and as far as I know, there’s no announcement of them being pregnant again.
ross
									
Okay. Bradley Cooper and Irina Shayk will share news of the impending arrival of their second baby.
carrie
									
Fine. Okay, hang on, hang on.
ross
									
Okay, I’m hanging.
carrie
									
Oh. Well, according to LatinTimes.com, both Lady Gaga and Irina Shayk are both pregnant with Bradley Cooper’s baby. [Both laugh.] Uh, yeah. I mean, I don’t see anything about that from a reputable source, so I’m gonna say that’s not a hit.
ross
									
Okay. Jack Nicholson will shock the world with an unexpected comeback on television. [Carrie responds emphatically.] I think we would have heard about that.
carrie
									
Yeah, I don’t think he’s on TV. [Laughing] You know what came up? Angelico Houston saying, “Jack Nicholson doesn’t do TV.” [Ross responds affirmatively.] Yeah, no, nothing’s coming up at all.
ross
									
Wow, this is actually surprisingly—
carrie
									
Bad? Yeah. Not good hits.
ross
									
Alright. There’s more, but that’s enough.
carrie
									
It’s interesting. It makes me wonder what the profit model of all these things are. No one must do the thing we’re doing. No one goes back through and sees if they were right.
ross
									
These lists, you mean?
carrie
									
Yeah, it seems like what we’re doing right now, people must not do.
ross
									
Here we go. A new film about the life of Michael Jackson will be announced, causing panic in his surviving family about the truths it will reveal. [Carrie responds emphatically several times.] That happened, didn’t it? Hey, okay. There we go. Had to find one they got right.
carrie
									
Um, did it say documentary?
ross
									
It just said film. Yeah, that happened.
carrie
									
Uh, yeah. Leaving Neverland.
ross
									
Which I haven’t seen yet. Still on HBO, right?
carrie
									
Probably? It is heavy stuff. It’s tough.
ross
									
Was Angelina Jolie hospitalized over stress and health woes resulting from her lengthy and bitter divorce with Brad Pitt? I don’t think so.
carrie
									
Gosh. What a thing to have someone predict about you. Okay, Angelina Jolie hospital. Nope. Nope, hasn’t been in the hospital since 2015.
ross
									
Did Jennifer Aniston meet and fall in love with a handsome European acting star?
carrie
									
[Laughs] Um, I think I kind of looked this one up earlier.
ross
									
I gotta say, this is fun, just coming up with these things. Random stab at the dark for the future.
carrie
									
Uh, you know, a week ago she said she was open to love, but no, nothing’s—doesn’t look like anything happened there.
ross
									
Alright, well so far our National Enquirer psychic squad is doing less well even than Sister Rocky.
carrie
									
I doubt they are even talking to someone who claims they are psychic. I bet just a person sits down and writes these out.
ross
									
Is this the equivalent of us ordering the Reiki infused SoulMalas?
carrie
									
[Laughing] Totally. And speaking of which, we had a couple updates!
ross
									
Oh yeah! Okay, yeah. Not an official update episode, but let’s throw that one in. What happened?
carrie
									
Yeah, since it’s the end of the year and all. Okay, so I was finally able to get SoulMalas on the line. It took a lot of emails. I kept being like, “Please help, please help! The tuning fork is at 530 hertz, it’s not working!” [Both laugh.] Uh, and they weren’t responding, like that wasn’t an emergency. Anyway, they finally did, and they were like, “Okay, okay. Thank you. You have two options. One is you can keep the product and we’ll issue you a 50% refund, or you can return the product and we’ll issue 100% refund.” Yeah. Fair. So I was like okay, and I’m thinking like, “It’s the holidays, I don’t want to go to the post office.” So I said I’ll do the 50% refund. But, by then they had already given me the address to send the return to, which I’m not gonna say here, ‘cause it is very clearly just someone’s apartment. But that really helped me and my rabbit trail, because I found the guy who owns SoulMalas. His name is Evan Hennessey.
ross
									
Oh, we did see his name attached to SoulMalas, yeah.
carrie
									
Oh! Where?
ross
									
There were posts online somewhere attributed to him.
carrie
									
Okay. Yeah, so I actually messaged him earlier today and said, “Hi, Evan. Do you own SoulMalas?” And he said, “Hi, yes I do. How did you know?” [Both laugh.] So I need to respond to him. But uh, he is a marketing dude in Colorado who, you know, if you look at his Instagram, just seems like a nice, young man having fun.
ross
									
Who surrounds himself with monks?
carrie
									
Uh, no, who surrounds himself with beautiful women, has a six pack. Just a person who you might be picturing right now as a guy who is into marketing. [Both laugh.] No shade, per se. Maybe some shade. I really doubt that those things were blessed by monks.
ross
									
That’s funny, we did hear from a guy named Andrew, who wrote, “Not all monk blessings are a sham.” And he said that he sells Malas and he actually does get them blessed by monks. He took a photo of himself— [Carrie starts laughing.] —with the monk, and he is mailing us some blessed malas, so hey.
carrie
									
Assuming that’s not a green screen.
ross
									
I love this photo of him with his eyebrows raised in front of this monk with his eyes closed. Uh, but yeah, okay. We’ve got some actual blessed items coming our way.
carrie
									
Okay, cool. I didn’t suspect there were no monk blessed items in the world, just that these particular ones are not, and that they were drop shipped from China. Uh, did they issue you your refund yet? Do you know?
ross
									
Not on my credit card statement yet.
carrie
									
Okay. ‘Cause I also did check their Facebook page, and there are so many reviews that are like, either “I never got my stuff” or “I bought one thing and then I kept being charged by them and finally I got through to them they said that in the fine print somewhere I was signing up for a monthly package.”
ross
									
Yeah, thanks for the heads up on that. I had no recurring charges thankfully.
carrie
									
That’s good. Well, when I wrote them back and asked for the refund, I was like, “Please confirm the refund and that you are not charging my friend’s card every month.”
ross
									
Yeah. Oh, good call. Uh, alright, well hopefully that shows up, and you still have it, right?
carrie
									
Yes, I do. Ding ding.
ross
									
Well actually, while we’re providing some updates from previous ingestigations, related to that one, there was also our VitalTones epsiode, where we talked about the app that plays sounds for you that are supposed to take care of all kinds of things, like pedophilia.
carrie
									
[Laughing] Right. And the owner wrote to both of us. His name’s Uber Dogen.
ross
									
Seemed like a nice guy.
carrie
									
Yeah. Seems perfectly nice. And he actually said that he really wanted to help Drew, because he really thinks that they can sort of make headway on his CP with these Vital Tones.
ross
									
Okay. Ongoing investigation then?
carrie
									
Maybe. I asked Drew if he was up for it. At one point he said yes, now I think he’s a little more on the fence. Uh, so we’ll let him decide. But yeah, you know, this is one of those times where I feel kind of bad for the guy. Because I doubt that this works, but I also appreciate the spirit of investigation this guy clearly has. Like, he believes in it.
ross
									
Yeah, and he’s willing for it to be put to the test. He’s an earnest person.
carrie
									
Yeah. For that much, good on ya.
ross
									
He even opened with the line, “I’ve enjoyed listening to your program about my VitalTones therapy. I couldn’t resist, and had to naturally write something about it.” Then he followed up at length. But yeah, he seemed like he was game, and wasn’t upset with our coverage.
carrie
									
Right. He did say one thing in his email that made it sound like he was saying uh, pedophilia is a brain disorder just like homosexuality and I wrote back and was like, “Wait, let me be clear here, what are you saying?”
ross
									
Oh, goodness.
carrie
									
And he did, um, clarify. He said, “Pedophilia is a brain disorder, homosexuality is not. It cannot be changed.”
ross
									
Hmm. Well then, why’d you mention it?
carrie
									
[Laughing] Yeah. I don’t know. We’d have to get into a long discussion about what the word disorder means. But, anyway, yeah. I hope we get to stay in contact with him, and—
ross
									
Oh, yeah, okay. He didn’t copy me on that last response.
carrie
									
—he’s a nice guy. Yeah. In the last 19 hours, he wrote to me and said, “Hi Carrie! We have updated cerebral palsy! We hope this version will have more positive effects!” And then he asked me how my migraines are. [Ross says “aww”.] Oh yeah, and he said, “We need to know this to improve more if necessary.” So I’ll write him back.
ross
									
Aww. We got a new pen pal out of this.
carrie
									
Yeah, so he’s sincere. That’s nice.
ross
									
Alright, well that’s uh, at least hopefully enough updates for this year. How was your 2019, Carrie?
carrie
									
Pretty “dece”. How was yours?
ross
									
Yeah. I liked it. Lot of fun stuff that happened.
carrie
									
So, Sister Rocky was right.
ross
									
At least about that. [Carrie chuckles.] Well, uh, that’s it for our show for this year! But we’ll be excited to see you again in 2020.
carrie
									
Our theme music is by Brian Keith Dalton.
ross
									
Our administrative manager is Ian Kramer. We’ve got a lot of fun new investigations we’re already working on, lot of things in the works that’s coming next year. We’re excited to share them with you. So uh, help support everything we do at MaximumFun.org/donate. You can also support us by leaving a positive review, telling a friend about us, mentioning us online. I don’t know, whatever you do.
carrie
									
[Laughing] Uh, go buy a shirt from the Etsy store.
ross
									
Oh yeah. Also sign up if you’re anywhere near San Francisco, for our SF Sketchfest show. You can find that on MaximumFun.org. Under “latest”, look for “events”, and you’ll see that they’ve got our show coming up in San Francisco back at Cobb’s Comedy Club on January 21st, 2020.
carrie
									
2020. 1/21/2020.
ross
									
That sounds so futuristic.
carrie
									
I’m getting married that year, partly so that we will never have to do complicated math.
ross
									
[Laughs] Oh, nice. Alright. Interesting. I got married in 2000. It does make it very, very easy. Boy, well, when we review predictions at the end of next year, our hindsight will be—
carrie
									
2020
ross
									
[Laughs] Thank you. Thank you for indulging that. You can also follow us online, Facebook.com/onrac.
carrie
									
Or Twitter @OhNoPodcast.
ross
									
And, you know, say something nice to someone around you.
carrie
									
Yeah, say something nice to someone around you.
ross
									
Yeah. Make them feel good. Make their day better.
carrie
									
And we’ll see you in 2020!
ross
									
Bye!
music
									
“Oh No, Ross and Carrie! Theme Song” plays until the promo.
promo
									
Music: Upbeat rock plays in the background. Announcer: Dead Pilots Society brings you exclusive readings of comedy pilots that were never made, featuring actors like Patton Oswalt— Patton Oswalt: So the vampire from the future sleeps in the dude’s studio during the day, and they hunt monsters at night. It’s Blade meets The Odd Couple! [Audience laughs] Announcer: —Adam Scott and Jane Levy— Jane Levy: Come on, Cory. She’s too serious, too business-y. She doesn’t know the hokey-pokey. Adam Scott: Well, she’ll learn what it’s all about. [Audience laughs.] Announcer: —Busy Philipps and Dave Koechner. Dave Koechner: Maybe this is family. Busy Philipps: My Uncle Tal, who showed his weiner to Cinderella at Disneyland, is family. Do you want him staying with us? [Light audience laughter.] Dave: He did stay with us, for three months. Busy: And he was a delight! [Audience laughs harder.] Announcer: A new pilot every month, only on Dead Pilots Society from Maximum Fun.
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MaximumFun.org.
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Comedy and culture.
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Artist owned—
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—Audience supported.
About the show

Welcome to Oh No, Ross and Carrie!, the show where we don’t just report on fringe science, spirituality, and claims of the paranormal, but take part ourselves. Follow us as we join religions, undergo alternative treatments, seek out the paranormal, and always find the humor in life’s biggest mysteries. We show up – so you don’t have to. Every week we share a new investigation, interview, or update.
Follow @ohnopodcast on Twitter and join the Facebook group!