Episode 95: Polly Wanna Justice?

Episode 95

30th January 2013

Kim brings a case against her husband, Chris. Kim has owned a parrot, Kobe, for a little over twenty years. The problem: Chris works at home and Kobe’s constant squawking is driving him crazy. Kobe isn’t too keen about Chris, either; Kim says that the parrot hates both her husband and their 12-year-old son. Are Kim and her family going too far to accommodate Kobe, or is it time for Kobe to (metaphorically) spread his wings and fly? Judge John Hodgman decides.

Episode notes

Kim brings a case against her husband, Chris. Kim has owned a parrot, Kobe, for a little over twenty years. The problem: Chris works at home and Kobe’s constant squawking is driving him crazy. Kobe isn’t too keen about Chris, either; Kim says that the parrot hates both her husband and their 12-year-old son. Are Kim and her family going too far to accommodate Kobe, or is it time for Kobe to (metaphorically) spread his wings and fly? Judge John Hodgman decides.

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Special thanks to Jaron James, who suggested a variation of this title.

EVIDENCE

Exhibit A:

“This is Kobe yelling “Kim” which he will do for hours at a time. My husband’s office doorway can be seen through the cage…yep; it’s about 25 feet away.” (Video Link)

Exhibit B:

“This is Kobe being a sweet bird – he likes watching operas on the computer from my shoulder.” (Video Link)

Exhibit C:

Kobe occasionally causes the dog to howl. (Video Link)

Exhibit D:
The parrot rescue website. Kim: “I’ve talked to a local avian vet and she and her organization have an excellent reputation.”

 

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Have your pressing issues decided by Famous Minor Television Personality John Hodgman, Certified Judge. If you’d like John Hodgman to solve your pressing issue, please contact us HERE.

Follow @judgejohnhodgman on Instagram to view evidence from the cases tried in court.

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