Today’s episode is ALL about dad-hacks, which is to say, how to hack your dad and make him buy you AS MANY expensive fish tanks as you want. We won’t lie: It’s not gonna be easy. But when you’ve got your hands on one of these big, aquatic beauties, you’ll know it was all worth it.

Suggested talking points: We The Fans, Fungus Medicine Theft, Authentic Egg Stink, Ancient Chocolates, The Earl of Earl of Sandwich, Travis Tritt’s Fish n’ Shits, Anarchist Ellen

Transcript available here

THE YEAR IS 20XX. Organic organisms have all but been erased from the face of Faerun. Today, a small band of resistance fighters will execute their final operation to topple their robot overlords. They will be joined by three goobers who have no idea where they are, or what’s going on, or anything, really.

Transcript available here

Rachel’s favorite big bread! Griffin’s favorite sports climax! Rachel’s favorite new Norwegian Pop Star! Griffin’s favorite underappreciated folk musician!

Music:

”Money Won’t Pay” by bo en and Augustus - https://open.spotify.com/album/7n6zRzTrGPIHt0kRvmWoya

”High Five” and “Don’t Kill My Vibe” by Sigrid: https://www.thisissigrid.com/

”Jesus Was a Crossmaker” and “Soldier of the Heart” by Judee Sill: https://www.amazon.com/Judee-Sill/dp/B000AL8Z8S

Transcript available here

We’re scattered hither and yon this week, so here’s our recent live show from the Shire-esque paradise known as Salt Lake City. Join us for discussions of homemade knives, skull-based fighting techniques and, hands down, the yuckiest Munch Squad ever.

Transcript available here

Griffin's favorite defunct appetizer! Rachel's favorite short-term job! Griffin's favorite deduction game nobody will play with him! Rachel's favorite graduation-boosting initiative!

Music: "Money Won't Pay" by bo en and Augustus - https://open.spotify.com/album/7n6zRzTrGPIHt0kRvmWoya

Transcript available here

A criminal crime happened in front of a breathless nation, and we’re just supposed to sit back and just like, celebrate a weak horse? This will not stand. We will not stand for it.

Suggested talking point: A Robbery on the Racetrack, Darth Navarro, Batilda, Big Awesome Bones, Wet and International Hamburgers, Susan Office, A Thrifty Snip

Transcript available here

The Pine Guard is scattered, in more ways than one. Kepler’s long-held secrets are coming to light over the course of a single evening. Their foe is beginning to take shape, but how much farther will they fall before they can stop it? Duck pushes the panic button. Aubrey confronts her past. Ned holds onto what little he has left.

Transcript available here

A surprise bit of travel has thrown our usual recording schedule right off its axis! Don’t panic, though. We’ve got a very fun episode just chock-full of Small Wonders here for you. It’s super, super casual.

Music: “Money Won’t Pay” by bo en and Augustus - https://open.spotify.com/album/7n6zRzTrGPIHt0kRvmWoya

Transcript available here

Wake Up and Smell The Future, It’s Time For Beanjuice™! Grind up the day! Here is Beanjuice™. It is an exciting opportunity: A contest, maybe! But one thing’s for sure: High-end luxury, and youth, and it’s not the stuff that’s left over in a can of beans, so please stop telling people that.

Suggested talking points: Beanjuice™, Amateur Panera Bread Server, Jerry Seinfeld: Latency-free Gamer, Off to See the Lizard, Rob Lowe’s Murderglobes, Accidental Butt Smack

Transcript available here

Griffin's favorite humble body of water! Rachel's favorite optical illusion fad! Griffin's favorite toilet hygiene friend! Rachel's favorite uplifting loneliness poem!

Music: "Money Won't Pay" by bo en and Augustus - https://open.spotify.com/album/7n6zRzTrGPIHt0kRvmWoya

Transcript available here